praise! i have $1510 to go toward my trip! i now need $290!! i wasn't expecting it, and i am so thankful. it's so interesting: on monday i prayed, "Lord, i am moving ahead with this and i want to go, but if you don't want me to, i am okay with that too. just do with me what you want." no more than 2 hours later, i checked my mailbox to find a letter telling me how much i have. i had to surrender it to Him.
i am slowly getting an idea of what i will do this summer. i offered to work at my current job (registrar's office) for a week or two past commencement in order to help them tie things up at the end of the semester. my boss said that's fine but that they don't have it in the budget for me to stay there all summer. i wasn't planning on doing that, but at least i had thought of it as a back up plan. door closed. so i'm going to connecticut sometime in may! and for at least a week (maybe more!) i want to RELAX. i need that so much right now, i am so worn out.
prayer! please, please pray for me. the end of this semester is so hard - academically and emotionally. i know that God is doing some great things in my heart and i look forward to writing a post about all that i have learned this semester. but for now, please pray that God would continue to change my heart and that i would surrender control completely to Him. i am so tired of this lie that i have been believing that i can control the world around me - my emotions, thoughts, circumstances. i can't. and i want to give that control completely to God - but i need to truly and deeply believe that HE IS GOOD and that He really does love me and cares about my best interest. please pray that i can do that - trust Him and give Him control knowing that it is for my best interest, even when it hurts and even when it's hard.
